Flangell; 365 DaysThis is a featured page

"365 Days" is my story about the first anniversary of the death of Detective Jessica Angell and in response to my own Pay Up Anniversary Challenge.

Okay, first off, I can't believe I'm even writing this story. For the obvious reason that CBS was stupid to kill Angell off in the first place. I even wrote my own version of Pay Up, where Angelllives. However, I've decided that with the first anniversary coming up, I would write a story as if.... Angell really had died (can't believe I just typed that!).

This is definitely a one-shot, connected in no way whatsoever to the rest of my stories. And most definitely the only story I will ever write where Angell dies.

Regarding dates: I realize CBS changed Pay Up's broadcast date from May 20th to the 14th, but but on the newspaper that Robert Dunbrook hands to Mac at the end of Pay Up, her date of death is printed as May 20th, so I'm going with that.
I'm using that newspaper for her birthdate as well.

Most things in CBS'sversion of Pay Up will stay the same, withone huge exception... the ending at King's Ale House. That shooting scene at the bar will not take place on the day of her death (May 20th, 2009), but for my story, one year later as the CSI/NYPD team gathers to remember the first anniversary of Angell's death. I will also deal with that not-so-clear scene when Flack shot & killed Simon Cade.

The primary focus of my story is Flack and is mostly a series of flashbacks of what the last year has been like for him.

Disclaimer: Seriously, I'm a Flangell fan. Would I be writing this if CSI:NY was mine? Not!
However, the following characters are mine: John Mikelson, Zachary Minor, Chad, Brenda, Mr. Brutners, and Detective Kate Panner.

FAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFAFA

Detective Don Flack, Jr. put the framed photo of him and Detective Jessica Angellback on the nightstand and took a deep breath. He was trying to psych himself up for tonight. Tonight he would gather with his NYPD colleagues at King's Ale House to remember Angell. It had been one year since she was shot and killed in the line of duty, and they all wanted to remember and honor her memory. Flack took another deep breath before heading out the door.

"How's that nice new apartment working out, Flack?" Messer asked, after the bar tender walked away.

"Big and lonely." Flack answered honestly and without looking up from his beer. Messer just nodded, he knew the money had been a big surprise.

~~~~ BEGIN FLASHBACK: ~~~~

Flack walked up to the door of the lawyer's office. Looked at the envelope in his hand again to verify the address, then went in. "Good afternoon." greeted the receptionist.

"Good afternoon." Flack said, returning her greeting. "My name's Don Flack. I received this letter, asking me to come here today." He said, handing her the letter. "You handle all the NYPD insurance stuff, don't you?"

"Yes, Detective Flack. We do." She confirmed, handing him back the letter.

"Is there something wrong with my insurance or something? I'm not really understanding why I'm here." He inquired, since the letter didn't explain that part.

"Mr. Brutners will explain everything. This way, please." The receptionist said, showing him to a side room, where he found Angell's father, all 4 of her brothers, her aunt Gail, and her close friend Detective Kate Panner, all seated at a large round table.

"Detective Flack, glad you could make it." Mr. Brutners greeted, shaking his hand and gesturing for him to sit. "You look confused, Detective."

"There's a reason for that." Flack said, starting to take the empty seat.

"We're here for the reading of Detective Angell's will." Brutners said, causing Flack to pause momentarily in a mid-sit position, before returning to standing. "You were asked to be here because you are in her will." He added, gesturing again for him to be seated. Flack sat down slowly, feeling like everyone in the room was staring at him and noticing how uncomfortable he was.

An hour later Angell's few possessions, mostly family keepsakes and memorabilia which meant a lot to her, had been distributed and Flack sat back from the table, stunned and with his head in his hands. "She surprised ya. Didn't she, Don?" Panner asked, placing a hand on his shoulder.

Flack nodded and looked up. "Why?" He mumbled, mostly to himself.

"Because she loved you the way you loved her." She stated.

"You knew. Didn't you?" Flack asked, looking up as the realization hit him.

Panner pulled up a chair and took a seat in front of him, so they were nearly knee-to-knee. "Yes. I did. The insurance company had contacted her because she'd never designated a beneficiary on her policy. She came to me to talk about it, then chose you. Simple as that."

"But...." Flack began, but Mr. Angell cut him off.

"But nothing. This is what Jessica wanted, and this is the way it's going to be." Mr. Angell said.

"This is for you, Detective Panner." Mr. Brutners said as he approached and handed her an envelope. "I believe you are expecting this."

"Yes." Panner replied with a sad nod, then turned to Flack and Mr. Angell. "It's the combination to her safe." Panner saw a surprised look on Flack's face. "That's where she kept her journals. Growning up in a testosterone filled house doesn't leave much room for sharing feelings, so Jessica's been journaling ever since her mother died when she was just nine." She explained.

"And these are for you, gentlemen." Mr. Brutners said handing an envelope to Flack and one to Mr. Angell.

Another hour later Flack sat on his bedroom floor at the foot of his bed, rocking himself and crying. He'd opened the outside envelope, which the lawyer's office had sealed, to reveal another envelope inside. This one had his name on it, too, but in Angell's writing. He hadn't brought himself to open it yet, because he couldn't get past her hands. Those delicate small hands of hers holding a pen and writing his name on a letter she knew he would get only after she died.

Don,
I guess the first thing I should say is, 'I'm sorry'. The chances that we both died at the same time in some undercover stakeout gone wrong are slim to none, and since you are reading this, that means I died first. I know without a doubt that if you had died first that I would be devastated and lost without you.
As I write this we've just gotten back from that wonderful three day trip we took to the resort where they thought I was Mrs. Flack. I don't know if I ever will be, but do know without a doubt that I love you.
As for the insurance money, do with it whatever you want. Maybe you'll travel like I always wanted to do. Mexico sounds nice, maybe because it's cold here in New York right now. If you ever make it there, I hope you'll think of me. Or maybe you'll finally get that motorcycle you've always wanted. I can see you getting out of the city and riding upstate on a warm fall day. If you ever do, just remember when you feel the wind rush past, that'll be me watching over you.
I'll love you always & forever,
Jess

Flack wasn't ready to travel yet, maybe when he retired. The motorcycle idea was nice, he'd think on that one. There was one thing he found himself thinking about, and that was moving. There were some nice apartments within walking distance of the precinct. He'd tagged along with Jess once to look at them. He could see how disappointed she was when they were far out of her budget. He'd even given thought to them getting one together. Bigger, very convenient for work, and even a parking space. Yeah, Jess would have liked that. And everything he had that reminded him of her, he could simply take with him, including her most recent journal that Panner had given him.
(end flashback)

"Come on, man. Let's find a seat." Messer said.

Most everyone had gathered around one of the large round tables, but Flack and a few others sat on nearby barstools.

Toasts were made and memories shared, but Flack kept surprisinglyquiet. His most cherished memories of his Jess weren't things he was going to share with others. He preferred to keep those for only himself. Everyone there noticed how quiet he was, but they all understood.

It was getting late when the shots rang out and glass shattered everywhere. Danny immediately pulled Lindsay down to the floor withhim, as did Mac with Stella. Adam, Sid, and Hawkes all dove under the table as fast as they could. Under tables, in booths, behind the bar, everyone took cover wherever they could find it, as fast as they could find it.

As the car drove away the loud noise of gunfire and shattering glass stopped just as quickly as it had started, and heads began popping up to see if anyone was hurt. "We're okay over here.", "Okay over here, too.", "Got one down here.", "Just glass cuts, we're fine.", "I've got one bleeding and need help." The calls out were varried and swift, but none carried more desperation that Messer's words, "I can't feel my legs.", followed by calls for help from Lindsay.

Since Dr. Hammerbeck was focusing on Messer, that left Dr. Hawkes to moved quickly around the bar to assess who they could help and for whom help was too late. Mac and Stella were first on their phones calling for backup and ambulances.

"Hey, Flack. Is anyone hurt behind the bar?" Hammerbeck called out.

"I think it's too late, Sid. I can't feel a pulse anymore." Flack called back.

"I'll check on him, Sid. You just stay there with Danny." Hawkes called out from one of the booths.

Hawkes made his way around the bar, but Flack was right, the bartender was dead. "Hey, Flack?" he called out, but got no answer. Then he could see legs moving at the end of the bar and made his way over. "Don?"

Hawkes crouched down next to Flack, who was sitting on the floor, leaning up against the end of the bar. He had been shot in the side. "Don, why didn't you call out for help?" he asked, checking out his injuries.

"Go take care of Messer." Flack instructed Hawkes.

"Sid's taking care of him." Hawkes informed him.

"What's wrong?" Mac asked, coming over. He had blood dripping from his finger tips, caused by a long laceration on his forearm.

"Flack's been hit. Bullet to the side, right between the ribs and across the chest cavity, at a downward angle. His pulse is thready." Hawkes said, definitely in doctor mode. "Bullet probably went thru both lungs. No exit wound." He added, looking up at Mac.

"You're gonna be okay, Don. Ambulance is on the way." Mac said, in his usual steady and reassuring manner, as he took a seat on the floor next to him.

Flack slowly shook his head. "Don't waste your time, Doc. It's too late for me. Go help Danny."

"I told you, Sid is looking after Danny. I need to keep pressure on this wound, Don." Hawkes, who was sitting on Flack's left, answered.

"No, Hawkes. Leave me alone." Flack said, still shaking his head slowly.

"Don, let us help you. This doesn't have to be a fatal wound." Mac said, trying to pursuade Flack to accept their help.

Flack just continued to shake his head slowly, "I said no. Just leave me alone. I wanna go be with Jess."

"Well, Angell is just going to have to wait a little longer to see you, because I'm not just going to let you die, Flack." Hawkes insisted.

"I said no." Flack repeated as he attempted to remove Hawkes' hand from keeping pressure on his wound. "Besides, we both know it's too late anyway. I can taste the blood already." He added, leaning his head back against the bar and closing his eyes.

"Come on, Don. Stay with us. You don't want to give up. Angell wouldn't want you to give up." Mac insisted.

"Flack! Flack, what the hell's going on over there?" Danny called out, having been told that something was wrong with his friend and it wasn't looking good for him.

"Lookin' like I'm gonna miss that Ranger's game, Messer." Flack replied back, barely loud enough for Danny to hear.

"Flack, listen to me..." Mac began, but Flack cut him off.

"No, Mac. You listen to me. I can't,.... I can't do this any more. Not without Jess. I've kept the happy memories as best I can, but there's just too much of a void in my life without her. This last year,.... it's just been,... I just can't do this anymore." Flack was breathing slower and heavier now.

"It gets easier, Don. Trust me, I know. One of these days you're gonna wake up and realize that Angell is withyou, just like Claire is with me." Mac said, pleading with his friend.

"You have that well rehearsed, Mac. That's the same schpeal you gave Hollis Eckhardt." Flack retorted.

"It's the truth, Don. One of these days..."

"No, Mac. No." Flack said, cutting him off and shaking his head adamantly. "Not one of these days. Not any one of these last 365 days, 'cause when I wake up.... that's when I lose her." Mac and Hawkes shared a confused look. "You all thought Eckhardt was crazy, but I didn't. Everything he said made perfect sense to me - well, not the murdering people part - but about Caliope." Flack winced at the pain in his chest, "You don't understand, there can't be a 'one of these days' for me. I lose her every day when I wake up, 'cause I've been with her every night. I've only managed to survive these last 365 days without her because I've spent the last 364 nights withher. As soon as I close my eyes, she's there..... she's there, Mac. She's there. My body's going to sleep, but my mind has me waking up next to her as if it's morning." Flack paused, seeing the almost distraught looks on their faces. "Don't you understand? During the day I'm living and working withall of you here in the real world, but at night I'm with her... at night I can talk to her, and watch her brush her hair, and laugh at her attempts to cook.... at night I can reach out and touch her, and feel her skin, and make love to her."

"Why didn't you tell us?" Hawkes asked.

"Why? So you could 'help me'? So you could send me to some shrink who would try to 'fix' me? No way, Hawkes, no way. Better to be crazy and have her 50% of the time than not at all. The only way I've survived these last 365 days without her, is because of the 364 nights with her." Flack saw the look of understanding come to his friends' faces. "You know how many brunettes there are here in Manhattan that think I'm some kind of nut. You know how many times I've walked up to some tall thin brunette on the street, thinking it was Jess?" Flack moved slightly, which sent a shooting pain across his chest.

"Listen to me, Don." Hawkes began, desperate to have his friend and colleague accept his help, "It doesn't have to turn out this way. But if you don't let me help you...."

"Jess' father told me she was 'too damn brave for her own good.', which may have been true. She was always brave when it came to her job, and I'll be damd if I'm gonna go out like a coward." Flack turned to Mac, "Listen, Mac, I want to make sure there's not any doubt in your mind about what happened in that boiler room with Simon Cade. I know some have wondered if I shot him in retaliation for him killing Jess, but I want you to know I didn't. I could have, easily, it's true. But I didn't. He went for his gun. That desert eagle that was on the floor beside him, I knew it was the gun he'd shot Jess with, and I'll admit I was happy when he reached for it."

"I understand, Don." Mac said, knowing that Flack had no reason to lie, especially now.

"I saw the look on your face, Mac... at the funeral. When you saw me sitting with Jess' family, instead of with the other cops." Flack began to explain.

~~~~ BEGIN FLASHBACK: ~~~~

"Detective Flack." Mr. Angell said.

"Mr. Angell." Flack responded in a low and sad tone, shaking hands with Angell's red-eyed father.

"I was wondering if you would join my sons and I in the family section today." Mr. Angell offered.

"Sir?" Flack said, very surprised.

Mr. Angelltook a deep breath, "Listen, Flack, I know you and my daughter were dating. I can tell how much you cared about her. Judging by the smile she wore lately, you obviously meant a lot to her, too. I've already talked it over withmy boys and they all agree that you should sit with us, that Jessica would want it that way. If you want to, of course."

"Yes." Flack responded, jumping at the opportunity to sit with the Angell family. Somehow it made him feel closer to Jess.
(end flashback)

"It's nice that he realized how much his daughter was loved." Mac said, but Flack didn't respond.

"Flack." Hawkes spoke up.

Flack just held a hand up, "It's okay, Doc. I realize I'm instructing you to go against all your training here. I just, I wanna be with Jess."

"His breathing's getting shallower, Mac. He's bleeding into his lungs and they're filling up." Hawkes said, shaking his head and feeling helpless as a doctor.

"Yeah, they did realize it." Flack began, continuing with the previous topic.

~~~~ BEGIN FLASHBACK: ~~~~

Flack had pulled up outside the Angell residence. Mr. Angell had stopped by the precinct previously and invited him to dinner on February 9th, for what would have been Jess' 29th birthday. He could see Jess' family inside, through the large picture window. Her father, her brothers, and some women; several younger, probably her sisters-in-law, and one older, either her aunt Gail or her father's girlfriend Sherry, he wasn't sure. It was hard to tell thru his tear filled eyes. They were all laughing. 'How could they laugh?' he asked himself.

"You should have come to the door." Flack heard, and turned to see Mr. Angell walking up to him just outside the precinct the next day. "Why did you drive away?" He asked.

"How did you know?" Flack inquired.

A few minutes later Flack and Mr. Angell sat across each other in a booth at Sullivan's Bar drinking their beers.

"So, you ready to answer my question? Why did you drive away?" Mr. Angell asked.

"As soon as you tell me how you knew." Flack politely responded.

"My son Jared saw you from an upstairs window." Mr. Angell informed him. "Your turn."

"I saw you all in there, having a good time and laughing." Flack informed him honestly. "I just,... I just couldn't."

"How long?" Mr. Angell asked. Flack raised a brow in question. "How long did you date my daughter?" He rephrased.

"Seven months." Flack took a drink of his beer. "Two weeks." Another drink. "Three days."

"You loved her, didn't you?" Mr. Angell asked and watched Flack nod slowly. "You ever tell her that?"

"On the way to the hospital." Flack closed his eyes and took a deep breath, attempting to remain focused on the conversation and not let his mind return him to the back seat of that patrol car with Angell bleeding all over the seat. But it didn't work. "I'd wanted to tell her for a long time. She should have heard it a hundred times by then, and I honestly can't tell you why I didn't say it those hundred times. I just...."

"It's hard to say sometimes." Mr. Angell said in an understanding tone, noticing Flack was struggling to find the right words.
"The important thing is, you told her. You had the chance to tell her and she died knowing you loved her."

Flack nodded, feeling the tears well up, "She squeezed my hand. After I said it, she squeezed my hand and looked up at me."
(end flashback)

"It's good that you talked to him. And good that you told her." Mac said.

"His pulse is getting weaker, Mac." Hawkes stated.

"It's okay, Hawkes. Really. This is what I want." Flack told him as he began to cough, blood now showing on his white teeth.

They could all hear the paramedics arriving with their gurneys in tow. One pair went to Danny where Sid was, and the other pair came over to Flack. "You're too late, guys." He told them with what could only be described as a slight smirk. "Go help my friend Messer over there, okay. He's got a wife and kid." Flack said, waving them off.

Hawkesstood and talked to the two paramedics, explaining to them that Flack was refusing medical attention and close to death. They offered him oxygen to make him more comfortable, but he refused that too.

"I cold have had a wife, too, ya know. If Simon Cade hadn't killed her." Flack said.

~~~~ BEGIN FLASHBACK: ~~~~

"Hey, Mom, I need your advice." Flack said, following his mother into the kitchen of his parent's home.

"What kind of advice, Don?" His mother asked as she made coffee.

"About shopping." He answered.

"Well, since you hate shopping, I can see where you would need advice." She joked.

"Very funny, mom. I've been to so many stores, but just can't find what I'm looking for." He said. She just looked at him with an arched brow, obviously needing more information. "I mean, there's yellow gold, white gold, and silver. Would she want one band or two separate ones. It should have a diamond, I think anyway, would it be...." Flack didn't get to finish as his mother embraced him.

"Oh my gosh, Don! Are you really going to propose to Jessica?" She asked all excited.

"What was that I heard?" Donald Flack, Sr. asked entering the kitchen.

"Don is going to propose to Jessica!" Mrs. Flack informed her husband.

"Congratulations, son. That's wonderful." Mr. Flack said to his son, with a huge smile on his face and shaking his hand.

"Oh, Don, you know how much we just adore Jessica." Mrs. Flack said, patting her son on the cheek like he was still a little boy.

"So, mom. Ring shopping. I need help. 'Cause if I have to look in one more jewelery case, at one more salesperson working off commission, I'm gonna go crazy." Flack joked.

"Don, why don't you go wait in the living room for a minute. Your father and I will be right there." Mrs. Flack instructed.

Flack obliged and two minutes later his father joined him, but his mother went upstairs. "What's going on?" Flack asked his father.

"You'll find out in a minute, son." Mr. Flack assured him.

Flack was sitting on the couch, flanked by his parents. "Don, your father and I have an idea. Well, a suggestion, really." Mrs. Flack said, and handed him a small box.

Flack opened the dark blue velvet box, "Grandma's Claddugh rings?" He asked.

"That's right. And before that, they were her grandmother's." Mr. Flack said.

"It's white gold, and has the second band of diamonds to go with it. It's really a lovely set." Mrs. Flack explained.

"Your mother and I would like to offer it to you, Don. You don't have to take it, but it's always been meant to stay in the family." Mr. Flack offered.

"At the very least, Don, you can use it to propose to Jessica. Which means you can avoid all that dreadful shopping." Mrs. Flack said with a smirk and nudging him, "Then, you and Jessica can decide together to keep them or if she prefers something else, you two can maybe shop for rings together."
(end flashback)

"I was just waiting for the right moment to ask Jess. The box is still in the bottom drawer of my nightstand. Will you make sure my parents get it back?" Flack requested of Mac.

"Of course I will." Mac assured him. "You were so lucky, Don, to find a woman that you knew you wanted to marry." He added, mostly making conversation to keep Flack's mind off the pain.

"I didn't always.... think that way,... that's for sure. Never thought I'd be... be asking someone to marry me." Flack stuttered as his lungs continued filling up with blood, making talking more difficult, "Until..."

~~~~ BEGIN FLASHBACK: ~~~~

"Reservation for Flack." Flack informed the lady behind the counter at the resort, who nodded and began typing on her computer. "There's no cell phone reception up here, Jess." He said, turning to the beautiful brunette.

"So that's the reason you picked this place?" Angell questioned.

Flack nodded with a smirk. "Not even the FBI can find us up here."

Angell smiled back, "I'll settle for dispatch just leaving us alone for the next three days."

"Sounds like we have a police officer staying with us." A tall blonde haired man in his fortys said approaching.

"NYPD Detectives." Flack clarified.

"Not for the next three days, we're not." Angell stated, play smacking Flack on the shoulder.

"Welcome to our resort. I'm John Mikelson, the owner." Mr. Mikelson said, shaking their hands. "Brenda," He said, addressing the lady behind the counter, who looked up at him, "Didn't we have a cancellation for the third floor?"

"Yes, sir, that's correct." She replied.

"Well, no need letting that room sit there empty, now is there?" He asked rhetorically. "Let's give Detective & Mrs. Flack here an upgrade."

"Oh, actually I'm..." Angell started to say.

"....a Detective, too." Flack said, placing a hand on her arm with a smile.

Angellsmiled back with a blush as they walked away, following the bellboy Chad to the third floor.

"Uh, Don?" Angell said, standing in the bedroom of the third floor suite, her eyes wide, staring at the massive california king sized four-poster bed. "Um, this is nice and all. Really, really nice. But, um, I'm not sure we can..."

"Yeah, I'm with you on this one. Very nice, but definitely a little out of our budget." Flack said, walking back into the living room area. "Excuse me," He said to Chad, "Are you sure this is the correct room. I didn't book anything this large."

"I'll double-check when I go back down for your luggage." Chad said before leaving.

Flack walked back into the bedroom and noticed that Angell had moved out onto the balcany. "Wow! What a view." She said, stating the obvious. The lovely greenery of the tree covered mountainside seemed to start just under them go on forever. The balcanywas very large and very private, with it's own hot tub and plenty of lounge furnature. The phone in the room rang and Flack left to go answer it. He returned a minute later. "This is the right room." He said, retaking his position at the railing.

"Seriously?" Angell asked with a raised brow.

"Mhmm. Seriously. You see, Mrs. Flack, this is the room another couple cancelled for and they upgraded us to here at no extra cost." He clarified and watched a smile grow across her face.

"I see. Sounds nice, but I should warn ya,... I could get used to this." she joked.

"Not on my city salary ya won't." he joked back.

A few minutes later Chad returned with their luggage, "Sorry about the wait, Mr. & Mrs. Flack. The other luggage trolley is unavailable. And I checked on your accommodations, they are correct. Here are your cards, ma'am." He said, handing over what looked like two small stack of credit cards to Angell. "The red ones are for the dining room, just turn one in each morning for your meal. The breakfast buffet is wonderful and served from 6-10am. The blue cards are for the Club House. You each get a round of golf and a round of tennis, or two of one, if you prefer."

"We do?" Angell asked, deciding not to correct him that she wasn't 'Mrs. Flack'.

"Yes, Mrs. Flack. It comes with the room." Chad said with a nod before heading for the door. "Just let us know if you need anything else."

Flack & Angell spent three wonderfully relaxing days at the resort golfing, playing tennis (well, actually Flack watched Angell play tennis), even a little horseback riding, enjoying lots of great food, drinks & late-night dancing, and then there was Flack's personal favorite activity; watching Angell sun herself in a red bikini on their very private balcony.

"Did you enjoy your stay with us, Mr. & Mrs. Flack?" Brenda asked from behind the counter.

"Yes, it was wonderful." they both replied, turning in their room keys.

"Mr. Flack," Mr. Mikelson the owner said as he approached, "I'm glad I caught you before you left." Flack turned to greet the man. "I didn't want to bother you during your stay, but wanted the chance to say 'thank you' before you left."

"For what?" Flack asked.

"For helping me get my wife back." Mr. Mikelson resonded. "She was very, um, very distraught for several years. You see, her brother had gone to New York City on business, and was killed while he was there. The police exhaused all their leads till we'd all given up and she, well, it was just very hard on her." he said, looking away for a moment. "Then we got a call last summer, saying that there was a new lead.

"What was her brother's name?" Flack asked.

"Minor. Zachory Minor." He answered.

Flack nodded at recognizing the name. He had been the one to work the cold case, found the new lead, and sent Zachory Minor's murderer to prison. "Closure can be very important for the family."

"And you gave her that closure, Mr. Flack. Um, I'm sorry, Detective Flack, I should say. It didn't bring her brother back, but your finding Zach's killer gave my wife the closure she needed to move on withher life.... with our lives." Mikelson said.

Flack nodded in understanding, "Thanks for letting me know, Mr. Mikelson."

"It was nice meeting you, Mrs. Flack, we hope you'll come stay with us again." Mikelson said to Angell as she approached and he departed.
(end flashback)

"Did you ever correct them?" Mac asked Flack.

Flack just shook his head and mouthed the word 'no'. "She didn't.... want to be rude and.... we both thought it was kinda fun, like an.... an inside joke." Flack began coughing again, bringing up blood this time. "But it sure got me thinking,.... that's for sure. I just wish, I'd gotten.... gottent the chance to.... give her that ring. Jess always did like... antiques, things... things that held memories.... she would have liked... wearing my grandmother's ring. Just wish... I'd gotten the chance go give.... it to her."

"Sid went with Danny. They're on their way to the hospital now." Stella said approaching and taking a seat on the floor next to Mac. She had a bandage wrapped around the palm of her hand due to glass cuts, and with the other she reached out for Flack's hand and offered a small smile as she wiped away a tear. Flack squeezed her hand back, letting her know he really was okay and that she didn't have to cry for him.

"Hey, Hawkes, do me a..... a favor, will.... will ya?" Flack requested, turning to look at Hawkes, but having trouble keeping his eyes open now, very little blue now showing. "Tell Sid, when he... when he does my autopsy..... that I want... I want a Z. Okay?"

Hawkes furrowed his brow in confusion. "You want a Z?"

"Yeah, ya can't tell me.... he doesn't get... get bored doing a Y incision.... every time. Tell him to.... at least be creative. It's me, after all." Flack said, attempting a smirk. Attempting to leave his friends something of his humor to remember him by.

Hawkes could see how much trouble Flack was having breathing now and watched the blood he had coughed up slowly run down his neck, but it wasn't much in comparrisonto the large amount that was soaking the side of his shirt. Oh how he desperately wanted to say something back with a smirk, to let Flack know that he understood, but he just couldn't. Hawkes just bit his lip, put his hand on Flack's shoulder and nodded. "Sure, Don. I'll tell him."

"And while you're at it,...." Flack attempted to continue, "tell Sid... 'thanks'... from me."

~~~~ BEGIN FLASHBACK: ~~~~

"Flack!" Sid called out, to stop him from getting in the elevator. Flack stopped and turned around to face the doctor. "You, uh, you got a minute?"

"Yeah. Sure, Sid." Flack replied, walking away from the elevator.

"Um, let's talk in here. Shall we?" Sid almost asked, a bit tentatively. Flack just nodded at what he considered to be unusual behavior from the doctor.

"Everything okay, Sid?" Flack asked, leaning against the table.

"Hmm? Yes, oh, um, yes, Flack, it is." Sid stumbled, "It's just that, you see,.... something occuredto me. Um, when I arrived at the hospital for... well, when you were there with Angell." Sid noticed Flack take a sudden deep breath at the mention of her name. "Well, it occured to me later that you might have assumed I would be autopsying her. And I just wanted you to know that I didn't. I know it's hard to think of someone you love being, well, cut up like that. Which is why I felt it important for you to know we didn't do that to her. It just wasn't necessary." Sid now noticed Flack give a silent nod and a sigh of relief. "First off, I want to assure you that I had a female ME come in from the night shift, someone who didn't even know Angell. And she only did bloodwork and tracked the wounds. Dr. Zimmer didn't even have to retrieve any bullet fragments, since the surgeon had already done that. It was very minimally invasive, Don." Sid said, his voice trailing off.

Flack looked down at the white tiles of the flooring and bit his bottom lip as he silently nodded. He was in deed relieved. He never did like the image of Sid stiching up the big Y incision across her bare chest.

"Thanks, Sid." Flack mumbled, then took a deep breath and stood fully as if preparing himself to leave the room.

"There's one more thing, Don." Sid said, stopping him. Sid opened his mouth to speak, but didn't.

"What is it, Sid?" Flack questioned, noticing him running his hands thru his hair and acting a bit nervous. "Sid?"

"Uh, yeah. Um, there is one more thing." Sid repeated, "Something that showed up on Angell's blood work." Flack just looked at Sid, waiting, "Angell was, um,... Angell was pregnant."

Flack felt Sid's words pierce his heart like a dagger and he found himself leaning against the table again. "Are you sure?" He asked.

Sid just nodded. "Barely far enough to read positive. She probably didn't even know."

"She didn't." Flack stated, "She'd made plans for that night that included a bottle of wine."

Flack saw Sid nod again and heard him say, "I'm sorry. I just though you should know."
(end flashback)

Mac, Stella, and Hawkes just sat by Flack there on the floor in silence. No one knew what to say. His losing Angell had been devistating, and now knowing he'd lost a child, too, just made it all so much worse.

"Ironic thing is, we'd actually had.... had 'the talk'." Flack stated, regaining their attention. "Ya know, the talk about having kids. It kind of surprised us both."

~~~~ BEGIN FLASHBACK: ~~~~

"Are we actually talking about kids, Don?" Angell asked, a bit wide-eyed and surprised.

"Sounds like it to me." Flack replied with a smirk and actually enjoying the almost nervous tone in her voice. "Don't look at me like that, you started this whole conversation. What's the big deal? It's not like we're talking about planning one at this very moment." He joked.

"Ya got that right." She replied, retaking her seat on the couch and putting her feet back across Flack's legs. "And for the record, we were talking about my brother and sister-in-law having another baby. Okay, okay. Alright then, how many?"

Flack mimicked deep concentration, "Either two or four." He said, rubbing her feet.

"Four?" She replied in surprise.

"Odd numbers aren't good when it comes to kids. Too much fighting that way." He informed her. "Your turn... how many?"

"One or two." She replied.

"Can't do just one." He stated matter-of-factly while shaking his head.

"Why not?" She asked.

He looked at her with an 'are you serious?' look on his face, "Can you imagine being an only child? We both have siblings that drive us nuts, but neither of us would want to be an only child either."

"Hmm, that's true." She thought outloud.

"Two it is then." Flack smirked, "Okay,... boys, girls, or one of each?"

"Boys." Angellanswered immediately and shaking her head. "I'd never know what to do with girls, especially two of them." Flack laughed at his tomboyish girlfriend. "Okay... your turn."

"Boys." Flack agreed without hesitation. "Well, at least one, anyway. Gotta carry on the Flack name, ya know." He gave her a teasing smile, "Don't worry, Jess, I'm pretty sure it's gonna be a long time before Three's arrival."

"Three? We both just agreed on two." She said to clarify.

"'Three', as in Donald James Flack, III (the 3rd)." He clarified in return.

"Wait a minute,..." She began, sitting more upright, "... are you telling me that you'd call your son 'Three', like the number?
You can't call a kid by a number! That's the government's job."

Flack laughed. "'Three' as in like a nickname, Jess. Okay, my dad is Donald, Sr. I'm Donald, Jr. Next in line is Donald, III."

"Yes, Don," She smirked, "I understand how the order goes, but,.... 'Three'?"

"It's better than bein' called 'Donnie', trust me." He informed her, still trying not to laugh at her exasperated expression.
(end flashback)

Flack's breathing was now shallow and uneven, blood now flowing from his mouth. His head hung to one side and his eyes were half closed. "Ma....Mac?" He coughed out.

"I'm right here, Don. We're all right here." Mac responded, with his hand still on Flack's shoulder.

"Burry me.... burry me next to Jess." Flack requested.

Mac looked up at Stell and Hawkes, each giving a sad nod. "Of course, Don. You'll be right next to her. Right next to her and Three."

Mac's assurance meant a lot to Flack, which he acknowledged with only the slightest nod. It was all he could manage. Hawkesput two fingers to Flack's wrist, where he gradually felt the detective's weak and thready pulse fade as Flack slipped away to be with Angell.

When Hawkes removed his hand, Mac and Stella knew their colleague and friend was gone.

"Now he can spend his 365thnight with Angell." Mac stated.
"And for once, he won't have to leave her in the morning."

~~~~~ R.I.P. ~~~~~
Detective Jessica Elisabeth Angell
February 9, 1981 - May 20, 2009
NYPD badge #9521 &
Detective Donald James Flack, Jr.
March 17, 1979 - May 20, 2010
NYPD badge #8571


Runner043
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Latest page update: made by Runner043 , May 14 2010, 11:21 AM EDT (about this update About This Update Runner043 Moved from: Fan Fiction: F - J - Runner043

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perfectionfreak Wow 0 May 17 2010, 6:50 AM EDT by perfectionfreak
Thread started: May 17 2010, 6:50 AM EDT  Watch
What a nice story!! I really enjoyed reading it :) it was really touching...
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